Even though I haven't been too successful in putting on weight lately, I have acquired some things that have worked for me in the past, as well as lessons I've learned that I can warn you new gainers out there of. So, I put together this little list of tips and tricks.
1. Don't worry about eating huge meals.
One of the things I focused too much on when I was first starting out was being able to eat large meals in single sittings. While that certainly helps when you begin to need more calories to maintain your weight, when you first begin to gain it is not a crucial.
Instead, focus on consistently eating. Between your meals, try to snack on anything you can. Keep something in sight so you remember to do so. I grew up only eating when I needed to, so I often forgot to eat at all. So, to get around that, or to get yourself into the habit of snacking, set up timers or get someone to remind you every two hours to get anything to eat. Remember, it takes just two weeks to make a habit of something.
2. Go on an Anti-Diet
A good way of thinking about what you need to eat is looking at what other people avoid when they're losing weight. Do the opposite of Atkins and load up on carbohydrates. Do the opposite of what breakfast food companies suggest and skip breakfast (the point being, by the time you get to lunch you'll be so hungry that you'll unintentionally overeat).
One good thing that diets suggest that is good for gainers is to keep track of your intake. Just calculate how many base calories you burn in a day (which depends on your weight) and any amount you consume after that amount goes toward your new weight. Since it takes 3500 extra calories to gain one pound, try to spread that amount over however many days you wish you gain that pound.
3. Protect your skin
I know that some of you guys like stretchmarks, but for those of us that don't, you can attempt to prevent them in several ways. You can use specialty lotion designed for pregnant women which cocoa or shea butter. I myself had a pretty severe allergic reaction to that stuff, so I stuck with vitamin E lotion. Be sure to apply it daily, particularly before a day when you plan to eat big. Also, to answer a question someone brought up, for the most part, stretch marks do not go away unless you lose that weight again--and even then they would just come back if you gained it back. However, for the majority of guys I know, they do get less pronounced and red as time goes on.
There are other problems that start to show up as you get bigger. When your thighs get to the point that they rub together when you walk, be sure to be proactive in preventing callousing. I've seen a lot of big guys whose skin looks well maintain, but when you see between their thighs or under their arms, their skin is very brown, rough and hard. It's generally an enormous turnoff, because it's a sign that you're not taking care of your body. Plus, it's extremely uncomfortable! So, be sure to use baby powder or wear boxer briefs. Just take a look at how worn my pair got after a few months!
4. Go to the gym
I'm not saying you should do any cardio, but lifting weights will do nothing but help you. Spend plenty of time working on your legs and lower back to help carry your future weight. In addition, working your upper body will only make you look bigger. The awesome thing is, because you're consuming so many calories and protien, your muscles will be fueled better and faster than most men there! Think of it as a permanent bulking phase.
And don't worry about burning too many calories. Lifting weights really don't burn that much at all. By the time you get home and have a sandwich, you'll have gained back what you lost. But, just like weight lifters, be sure to have a protien-packed, large meal right away.
5. Be patient!
The people who generally want to gain weight are those who can't do it very easily. As such, you can't be impatient when it comes to results. Even if you don't see any, keep trying. You'll run into similar plateaus down the road where the same mentality applies. Sometimes all it takes is trying something new. For me, it was going to the gym for a year.
If all else fails, try again later down the road. I attempted to gain in high school only to see absolutely zero results. It was immensely frustrating and I did give up, but a true gainer can't resist their desire to be bigger. Even if it takes waiting a year to let your metabolism slow down, you'll get there. Just keep trying!
5 Tips for Gaining
Lazy Lazy
I don't have much to report this week either, really. Spring Break ends tomorrow and boy, I haven't done anything this week. The vast majority of my time was spent sleeping or playing video games. I haven't eaten a whole lot, but I sure have been pretty sedentary. It was a shame I didn't get to go on my cruise, but my parents have offered to buy me a pair of cruise tickets for a graduation present, and it's very tempting.
I don't know how this has affected my weight yet. I've decided not to weigh myself for a while. It's made me a little less concerned about putting on weight as fast as possible, and I like that. Who knows how long that will last though, hah.
More exciting post next week, I promise.
Spring Break
Oh dear, is it Sunday already? I've sort of lost track of time, as my final spring break ever started on Thursday. Unfortunately on that same day, I also had more work done on my toes (hopefully for the last time) so it got off to a pretty uncomfortable start. We're not going anywhere this time either, as the cruise plans fell through, so I'm pretty much just going to spend this week being pretty sedentary. Not that I mind.
I found out I got my first impersonator the other day (thank you for the tip, anon). I'm a little flattered that I've been deemed attractive enough to impersonate, unlike the collegehumor incident where the guy was just in it for the money. Usually it's guys like bigbryan or huge superchubs who get the impostors. I'm starting to get a tad annoyed that he seems to be ignoring my request to take the profile down, though. I'm not saying you should harass him about it, but I'll just leave the link to the profile here (Well, that was fast! Thanks guys). He even cataloged all the pictures I've posted on this blog. I suppose that's the risk you run by having so much content up in public view. Still, it's interesting that there are so many impersonators in this community. You'd think that impersonating a fat man would be something that wouldn't be so common, given the stigma they have in most situations.
But yes, my name is not Jim and I'm not from New York. For those of you who don't know, my name is Pete, and I hate myspace.
The Hunt for Shorts
Okay, so, I've always had a big butt. I admit it. Even at 140 pounds I did. I would have weighed even less if it weren't for my legs, which were a bit disproportionally muscular. This is due to an embarrassing nighttime habit I had as a child all the way up until high school. When I was working with my extremely gay boss before I had gained anything, he said I had a pretty 'ghetto booty.' Keep in mind, this is what I looked like (I wore that exact thing on a regular basis there)
Gaining weight is slowly making it come into proportion, I think. Unfortunately, it's still kind of hard to find pants that fit because of it. Take, for example, my old brown shorts that you've seen a lot here. (Best example: in these posts) They fit fine for the longest time, but slowly just got a bit uncomfortable. I can still put them on, but what (typically with all my pants) happens is that the back gets very tight and the front is very loose. I don't mind until I sit down.
So no luck was had a Walmart last night--you haven't seen horror until you've been to a Kentucky Walmart--and the prices at Casual Male XL are just absurd ($98 for a pair of shorts? Really?) and both of those places are just so... lame. Their clothes are for older, more professional fat men. Where's the semi-stylish clothes for fat young guys? I know I'm not the only one.
Edit - Don't get me wrong guys, I'm not complaining. I'm actually pretty giddy that I'm outgrowing some stores. I'm just worried I'm going to lose my last pair of shorts before I can find another!
Waists
It's very strange how my perception of my own waist size hasn't changed one bit throughout my entire life. It makes sense, seeing as how rarely I see myself from the side and behind, but the only thing I have to go by is my weight. If I've gained weight, I have to assume maybe I've moved up a pant size.
I've never once picked up a pair of pants and been able to guess the size that fits on the first try. Like most people I tend to underestimate pant sizes, but unlike most people that actually makes me pretty happy. The other day, I go to buy some new shorts. I don't know if you've noticed, but I've basically got one pair that I wear almost constantly. They're perfect for me, though. Soft, light, and most importantly, elastic. They're a lazy man's shorts, basically.
Anyway, I find a more appropriate pair at Target (my favorite place to shop) and decide to try them on. I pick up a pair of 38"s because that's what I usually wear in shorts (pants tend to be a bit tighter, so I get 40"s). Before going to try them on--something I never used to do but now have no choice--I remember what I said above, how I always underestimate the size. So, I swap out for the 40"s. These things look like you could use them as a sail, so I'm thinking maybe they're too big, but I go to try them on anyway.
They don't fit. I almost busted the butt in them when I sat down. I haven't gained hardly anything since the last time I tried on pants and I've had no trouble with my current pair, so I chalked it up to an undersized pair, but that was the largest pair they had. In fact, most of the sizes of clothes at Target stop at 40 inches. Pretty soon I'm going to have to start shopping somewhere else--maybe even a specialty store.
The thing that hit me the most, though, was how wrong I was about the size of that thing. Something I thought was far too big (I mean, you could pitch a tent with these things, man) ended up being too small. That means I have a pretty big butt, but I hadn't noticed one bit! I still only wear Large-size shirts, and yet my waist size is going up and up. Do I really have such a big butt?
Inflatable Git
Sorry about the delay. Unfortunately, I'm still feeling pretty crummy, but luckily earlier in the week I got a chance to do what I intended to do for Sunday's post. One of my readers was awesome enough to send me an air pump for me as sort of an early birthday present. I had always wanted to try out inflation, so I was eager to get to it.
I had dabbled with water inflation when I was younger, so I had a good idea of what to do and how to be safe with it. I'd been watching a lot of inflaters on YouTube lately and it was just almost fate that I got to try it for my birthday! I took some very nsfw pictures while I was doing it that you can view if you so choose here. (warning- pantless/naked and some butt shots)
It might not be something you guys care to see, but it's a good way to add some new video material in between my gaining dry spells, and hopefully it will increase my appetite. Plus, I enjoy it like crazy, so hopefully I'll stick with it if only for my sake. If any of you guys do inflate yourselves, any tips you can share would be great.
Here's a short video clip I took. I'm not sure if you can tell a difference at all but you can tell how much I was loving it. I also apologize for how horribly unshaven I am; I blame the illness.
ps. thanks for the birthday wishes!
Glutton
I apologize again for the whiny tone of that last post. I was in kind of a worrying state of mind because I had some minor surgery (if you can even call it that) in store a few days after. My two big toes had some pretty serious ingrown nails and infections. I had put off going to the doctor for far too long (almost a year) and was afraid of what was going to come of the procedure.
It wasn't too bad though. I'll spare you the details, but I was off of my feet for all of last week outside of going to class. I don't think I was any lazier than I usually am, but I've gained some weight back that I lost from slacking off over the past few weeks.
I want to thank you guys who commented on that last post. I know I should just go with the flow, but it seems the more I grow, the more and faster I want to grow. It's a pretty greedy mindset, but I can't seem to think otherwise. I almost feel it’s necessary for a gainer or bodybuilder.
When I was little--both in age and in size--I remember being told I was annoyingly modest. I disliked being that way, but I didn't really have the confidence to behave any other way. Nowadays, I still maintain some of those mannerisms out of habit, but the truth is when I get compliments from you guys, I eat it up. I am proud of what I've achieved and I love actually getting attention for it. I'm just a big greedy, prideful, lazy bastard.
It sounds terrible when I write it like that, but it's true. I can't defend myself. I'm purposefully being inactive, putting on weight because I'm attracted to it and subsequently chronicling it on the internet. That's, like, four sins right there. I don't feel bad about it, though. Being happy and proud of my body is much more preferable to being unhappy and annoyingly modest.
I do worry about becoming too prideful, though. I know of a lot of gainers and even more bodybuilders who are just the biggest assholes you'd ever seen. I like to think that I can use my jealousy of bigger men (yet another sin) to keep me in my place. So, as long as I don't become the largest man on the planet, hopefully my personality won't change. If that fails, I hope you guys will give me a good internet smack and put me in my place!
